Once a popular television actor and movie director, Rob Reiner has since come to the forefront of Hollywood activism, using and manipulating children to get what he wants and mercilessly attacking greedy corporations. Reiner even will blatantly lie if it means get what he wants, "imposing his will upon people" as Eric Cartman, who once idolized him, would say. He is almost constantly eating and his belly is far too large for any of the shirts he wears to his rallies. He hates nothing more than smokers, and works feverishly in the guerrilla anti-smoking campaigns, going so far as murdering people so that they can blame their deaths on smoking. He is filled with goo and has built a machine to transfer goo between people, though it seems to fail for Tom Cruise during his attempt to borrow Muhammad's power not to be ridiculed.
- "These poor innocent children have been seduced into smoking tobacco. So I say, "We fight fire with fire!" We're gonna use these children to bring the tobacco companies down!" (Butt Out)
- "Uh, we're just leveling out the playing field. The tobacco companies lie to you about the dangers of smoking. If we're gonna take them down, we've gotta lie right back!" (Butt Out)
- "Okay, now watch yourselves, kids. These tobacco company people will do anything to get you hooked on smoking. They are liars and they are frauds!" (Butt Out)
- "You kids need to understand something, okay? Sometimes lying is okay. Like, when you know what's good for people more than they do." (Butt Out)
- "Eric, do you know what a hero is? A hero is somebody who sacrifices himself for the good of others. You can be a hero, Eric. All you have to do... is eat the cupcake." (Butt Out)
- "Any goo can be harvested from a person's body, and easily placed into another" (200)
- "Hey Barbra. It's me, Rob Reiner. Listen, Babs, we are taking on the town of South Park and we really need your help." (200)
- Though Reiner has been mercilessly criticized in multiple episodes of the show, Trey Parker is a fan of his film-related work, particularly Spinal Tap, and only resents the methods Reiner uses in his political activism.